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Recently disclosed...
  • NASA has created the Office of Planetary Protection which is tasked:

    To ensure that we take prudent precautions to protect Earth's biosphere in case life does exist elsewhere.

    A reasonable precaution in case of an alien contact.

    Alien Contact

    It has been reported that a nine year old applied for the position of NASA planetary protection officer. Everybody thinks this is just a cute human interest story but it is much more. I have proof that the Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) already has an elementary school aged Planetary Protection Crew in place and they have already made contact with an alien race! Don't believe me? I have secret footage that will destroy all doubt:

    Why has this historic encounter been hidden from the public? Do the governments of Japan and the United States have something to hide or is suppressing information just something that governments do? Do these aliens only engage with children? I have filed an FOIA (Freedom of Information Act) request for details and I'm awaiting a response.

    Update: I've been noticing suspicious looking men and women lurking (dressed in black suits and wearing dark glasses). I see them at my job, in my grocery store, at my Starbucks. Did I hit a nerve? I'm on the run now, in fear for my life, but I will not give up my quest for the truth!

    Update: In the interest of full disclosure, I have discovered that there was a convention of "Blues Brothers" impersonators at the community center on the day I started noticing agents in dark suits and glasses. I understand this is a marginally acceptable explanation for what I've been experiencing but I remain skeptical.

  • It's all over the news, you can't miss it. "Trump colluded with the Russians", "Obama hid evidence of the Russians", "the Republican National Committee colluded with Breitbart", "the Democratic National Committee colluded with CNN". The accusations are flying in every direction. What are we suppose to believe? I can now prove that all the allegations are a smoke screen perpetrated by politicians and media on both the left and the right to cover-up the most heinous of collisions. That's right, the unholy union of Donald Trump and Nancy Pelosi!!!

    Trump Pelosi

    Impossible you say, where could these two bitter enemies find common ground? Money of course, the root of all evil (romance rumors are floating around but I have no definitive proof to report on these allegations, no "Fake News" here). Once I was able to decipher their ingeniously encoded company name...

    Pump Trelosi

    Everything fell into place. This highly profitable company specializes in the manufacturing (in China of course) and sale of items geared to the current political climate. "Make America Great Again" and "Not My President" T-shirts, hats, bumper stickers, signs, stationary, chewing gum, mylar balloons. You name it, they make it. No wonder there is such heated rhetoric, it boosts the bottom line. Take a look at their latest shameful contrivance:

    Shakespeare in the Park

    That's right, the official "Shakespeare in the Park" comfy seat cushion. Shame on you both for converting passions to profits!

     

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Conspiracies are all around us. They are bred from a labyrinth of insidious origins:
  • Backroom deals, collusion across nations, total power corrupts totally. Bring to light the villainous actions of Politics.
  • They thrive in the shadows, some for centuries. Expose the intrigues of these Secret Organizations.
  • Across the universe, they're investigating us. Are they just curious, are they making sure we do not become an intergalactic threat, or are we their biological experiment? What do the Aliens want from us?
  • You can lock your doors, you can lower your blinds, but you always know They're Watching.
  • The ghosts, the demons, the witches, the archaic texts, and the constant cover-up of the Supernatural.
  • Famous people and their infamous deeds. Even Celebrities can't hide from the truth.
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My ex-wife, Jane Doe, is in league with the devil.
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Hillary Clinton secretly raises campaign funds by renting Bill to bachelorette parties.
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Donald Trump secretly raises campaign funds by teaching anger management classes.
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Agents from the Zmofgaf galaxy have infiltrated Earths aluminum industry to remove key alloys that are required for tinfoil hats to be effective.
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