Aliens

Aliens

Whether they're from a distant galaxy, the Milky Way, or our own solar system, the aliens are here. Do they hide just outside our view or do they mingle among us? How do they perpetrate this global cover-up? Do they collude with our governments or is this a massive demonstration of mind control?
 
It's up to you, expose the aliens!

We all know about the spaceship crash in Roswell New Mexico. What we don't know is what happened to the extraterrestrials piloting the ship. Some believe they disguised themselves and live among us even now. Some believe the government has them imprisoned in the deepest sub-basements of Area 51. Finally the truth has been revealed. After weeks of negotiation, interplanetary war was avoid by conceiving a proposal profitable to all parties involved. NASA, the High Counsel of Ganymede, and Vince McMahon (mostly Vince) conceived the AWE (Alien Wrestling Entertainment). The AWE is strictly hidden from human audiences but it's existence has finally been exposed by capturing, with the aid of an unusually strong solar flair, a short film clip of a match in progress. Watch as the sideways, toothy mouthed alien is about to apply the most electrifying move in alien sports entertainment.
 
 
After months of effort, a few sentences have finally been translated:
 
First Alien: Finally!!! The Sideways, Toothy Mouthed Alien has come BACK to the Gaspra Asteroid!!!
Second Alien: NoteI'm just a sexy Spongey Head, Goggly Eyed Alien. Note  I'm not your boy toy Spongey Head, Goggly Eyed Alien. Note
 
If you're looking for the AWE to show up at a venue near you, don't hold your breath. For some reason, the governments of the world feel they must hide this sports entertainment from the people of earth but nothing can hide from Odd Conspiracy Central.
 

Are the aliens coming? They've already arrived!

Alien

I was able to obtain this secret footage of a devastating alien attack!

Sadly, after years of effort to translate the alien speech, this encounter has been shown to be a tragic misunderstanding.

VHS Tape

The last words the alien spoke were:
"Wait! Don't shoot! I come in peace! I've been stuck in a time warp sense 1985 and I just want to return this VHS rental of "John Carpenter's The Thing". Can you point me to the nearest Blockbuster Video?"
 

The government has done everything it can to conceal this wanton destruction of alien life but I, at great personal risk to myself, bring the truth to you.

 

For years scientist have been trying to contact beings from another planet. It has finally happened!!! But imagine their disappointment when the aliens were found to be nothing but a bunch of delinquents.

Delinquent

Watch as they try to rip off a police car for a joyride.

This alien contact has been classified Top Secret but I have eyes and ears everywhere.

The whole world has been waiting for contact with an extraterrestrial intelligence. This was never intended for public disclosure but a robotic probe landed just outside of Kyoto Japan.

Rocket Robot

Imagine the excitement in the scientific community. Discussions, at times very heated, were held by the greatest minds around the world as a presentation showing the nature of mankind was being assembled for display to the alien robot. Everything came to a halt when the Kyoto police responded to a silent alarm at a Sony warehouse. The robot was captured attempting to beam hundreds of PS4 consoles and "Call of Duty: Black Ops III" DVDs to the mother ship hiding on the dark side of the moon. The robot is imprisoned in a super-secret high security prison known only to individuals sharing the highest security ratings for their nations. I was able to capture this short film clip by sneaking into the prison when a PSIA (Public Security Intelligence Agency) agent was photographing security measures containing the probe.

The robot is doing 3 to 7 years for burglary. This relatively light sentence is due to this being the robots first offense on this planet. Secret agencies around the world have tried to suppress this story but nothing gets past Odd Conspiracy Central.

 

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