Recent Conspiracies

Hot off the presses

Newly disclosed, hot off the presses, the most recent conspiracies...

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  • The more things change, the more they stay the same. We all know Bill Clinton tends to take advantage of his interns but we never knew it's history.

    Bill Clinton

    Now, with this newly found footage, we can see Hot Springs High School student counsel president Bill Clinton (everybody called him Cal back then) interviewing a new intern:

    Need we say more?

     

  • Politics makes for strange bedfellows but I don't remember any as strange as this. Revealed here first on Odd Conspiracy Central, Maxine Waters from the United States House of Representatives and Ted Cruz from the United States Senate have joined together to form the Commu-fasci-dema-repubcan party.

    Maxine and Ted

    Maxine and Ted aren't confirming or denying but I was able to gather this information from an anonymous source at the House Intelligence Committee. My source informed me the information was obtained using a "perfectly legal" phone interception. Apparently the current political climate has convinced Maxine and Ted that they can unify the extreme elements from both sides of the spectrum to the Commu-fasci-dema-repubcans (also known as "The Coalition of Constitutional Chaos"). Even more surprising is their chosen 2020 presidential candidate:

    Alice Cooper

    Alice Cooper

    When asked about his qualifications to receive this nomination, Alice was heard to say "Hey, you got me, I'm just happy to get the gig".

     

  • There has been a recent rash of disappearances across the world. Young women disappearing from nightclubs. Why haven't you heard of this? The mainstream media has apparently been covering it up for "our own protection" and to "avoid panic". Who are they actually protecting? Certainly not us! Don't believe me? I have proof:

    Flashlight

    This is the insidious "Flashlight of Lust", a device that renders the female gender totally helpless. From security footage I was able to recover, watch this dangerous tool in use:

    WHAT WAS THAT THING? It is one of a black-ops secret bio-engineering experiment for the new super-solder, a Fork-tongued Gerbilman. By disclosing this, I've become a hunted man. Now YOU know. Beware, they're always watching, they may be hunting you!!

     

  • Living in Amityville, Long Island, can be spooky. Living next door to the Amityville murder house can be even spookier.

    Amityville

    The Delgado family was nervous, but with the incredible deal they were able to negotiate, how could they possibly turn down their beautiful new 5 bedroom split level home. Moving in went smoothly, their new neighbors were more than welcoming and friendly, but on the seventh night, a moonless night, well, I'll let the security footage speak for itself:

    Andrea Delgado was heard to say, and I quote: "I swear, it sounded like demons shrieking from the bowels of hell!!" Needless to say, they packed their belongings and moved back to Spain the next day. If only they had waited I could have explained it all to them. Apparently Roseanne Barr was visiting next door.

    Roseanne Barr

    And she had been practicing for her next rendition of the National Anthem.
     

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