Supernatural

Graveyard

Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and cauldron bubble. Covens, satanic cults, poltergeists, vampires, werewolves...

Bring these supernatural threats out of the shadows.

Zombies are a horror movie staple. Grotesque, shambling remnants of what was once a human being with only the desire to consume human brains.

Zombie

What is even more horrible is that they are real! Yes, a failed special forces experiment to create a more resilient soldier went horribly wrong. Real zombies however, are not as mindless as the movies portray them. The results of this horrible experiment reside in a secluded section of area 51. They form somewhat normal familial bonds and even have children. The U.S. military denies this of course, but they can't argue with this short film clip recorded by a proud zombie parent taken at the Undead High School Senior Prom:

Aah, young love.

 

One of America's great mysteries, the original colonists of Roanoke Island. Sometime between 1587 and 1590 the entire colony disappeared. Nobody has been able to find the reason. Nobody until now! Roanoke Island is now a peaceful, sleepy North Carolina community. They do, however, take Halloween very seriously.

Halloween

All the children have costumes and every home is well stocked with candy. Helen Beasley had just arrived in town, the new forth grade English teacher did not really care for children and certainly did not respect Halloween traditions. Her neighbors tried to stress the importance of the holiday to her but she ignored them, a decision she would soon regret. Luckily I was able to retrieve this security footage and escape with my life:

An ancient curse on the island has controlled the children on All Hollow's Eve for centuries. The sole survivors of the massacre of 1588 was a family who had made toffees from tree sap and sea salt, all others where devoured by the children. The tradition has been passed down from generation to generation. So if you find yourself on Roanoke Island during Halloween, DON'T FORGET THE CANDY!

 

Everybody knows Henny Penny from "The Sky Is Falling" incident but very few know of her failed music career.

Chicken

Henny had longed to be a human being and finally her fairy godmother hen granted her wish. What surprised everyone was her excellent singing voice. Shortly after her transformation, an A and R man from Parrot Records picked up her act at The Roxy and immediately signed her for her first album. Here is some rare footage of Henny at her most popular:

Henny's hit single "Buk Buk Braak" shot to number 10 with a bullet on the Billboard charts and it seemed the sky (before it started falling) was the limit. But everything came to a halt when the Hollywood tabloid "The Barnyard Examiner" released evidence that Henny had abandoned a dozen eggs in her nest (the orphan chicks were placed in the foster coop system). The fan backlash was immediate and Henny was reduced to hanging out in bars and making guest appearances on daytime game shows. There were now rumors of roosters in and out of her hotel room like a revolving door and her fairy godmother hen finally was forced to change her back to a chicken for her own good.

Well, that's showbiz.

 

Beautiful young Mary Richards had just moved to Littleton Illinois. Fresh out of college, she was beginning her broadcast career at WGNV channel 5 as a roving reporter (she might just make it after all). After reporting on a particularly moving story on how Champ had saved grandpa Walton from a well, she was driving back to the station in the Live Eye Van and decided to stop at the local grocery store to pick up a few essentials. Words might not be able to describe what she saw but this film clip will:

After a narrow escape, she immediately called the FBI to report the zombie outbreak. The FBI informed the NSA. The NSA informed the URTL (so secret I don't even know what the initials stand for). The town of Littleton was cluster bombed and erased from the map.

As the cleanup crew scoured the remains of the town to eliminate any remaining zombies, a semi-intact flyer was found. In bold print the flyer advertised "Tonight only at Antonio's Grocery, fine wine and carpaccio tasting".

Carpaccio

The cover up immediately went into high gear. Roadblocks were set and the destruction of the town was blamed on a freak tornado. I am now finally bringing you the truth. How could they possibly think these upstanding citizens were eating human flesh? By the way, could I get some fava beans and a nice chianti with that?

 

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